Deposit Friendly ATM my ass...

Yesterday afternoon, around 1:30 pm I drove down Mission St. to the location of my Chase bank.  It took awhile to find a parking space, as it usually does on Mission in the afternoon; or anytime for that matter.  I did get lucky once I found a spot though; someone had left 23 minutes on the parking meter.  In San Francisco, where parking is at an extreme premium finding a meter with time left on it is like a confirmation that karmic retribution actually exists.  In my opinion, when things like that happen it’s more a proof that god exists than the most common reasons devout’s usually give. 

 Ahh…parking. It always proves to take San Franciscans on a complete tangent off the main line of their conversation….moving along…I parked about 50 yards from the bank and was able to walk there in about 3 minutes.  Thankfully no one was in line for the ATM so I breezed right in.

My local Chase branch located at Mission and Ocean in the San Francisco Mission district had just been finished being remodeled.  I can only assume this was a result of the switch from WAMU to Chase. 

I stroll in and the first thing I notice is the lack of envelopes anywhere near the ATM. I naturally walk to the little table they provide with deposit slips and that sort of thing and to my surprise find no envelopes. 

As I’m gazing at the ATM from about 10 feet away I see a sign on the ATM. It reminded me of a sale sign in Safeway.  It said “Deposit Friendly ATM.” My initial reaction was “o.k, I thought all ATM’s were deposit friendly, isn’t that the point.”  

What I soon realized this was a nod to their new envelope and deposit slip less ATM idea.  Which sounded good enough as I swiped my card and began picking my options.  The screen told me I could deposit up to 50 bills at a time.  I someday wish I have enough money to that…I guess I could use 50 one dollar bills just to do it. 

On this trip I was only depositing a single 100-dollar bill.  The slot opened up and I slipped the bill in to the tune of the screen telling me to please wait…which ended up being famous last words. 

Of course it spit the money back out and said “some of your bills were unacceptable, please go see a checker for assistance.”

The slot opened up again so I tried again to the same result.  It would only allow you to try the deposit three times before automatically canceling your request.  Which is a safety measure I imagine in case someone else is trying to use your card. 

I stood there while people came in and got in line behind me and attempted to put my single bill in the ATM for about 20 minutes.  It continually spit the bill back at me 21 times before I got so frustrated that I at least walked into the bank to see if I could quickly see a cashier. Too add injury to insult my buddy called me in the middle of all theese shenanigans and I told him why I was frsutrated and he said "oh man, thats old news buddy." That pissed me off even more...not because of what he said but because it was old news that ATM's are harder to use now.  New ideas aren't alwasy better. 

Of course there was about 15 people in line and everyone knows banks, similar to the DMV are notoriously slow at serving anything.  I decided to try again at the ATM.  At this point someone had walked in and I had to wait in line for a few minutes. 

As I stepped back up to the ATM with a renewed sense of hope, it was quickly doused when again the ATM spit my 100 back at me six times. 

The whole time I reading the new signs on the ATM….Deposit friendly ATM…and laughing at the corporate world.  Corporate America, to me, encapsulates almost all aspects of backward thinking I have ever seen. 

In my entire life of dealing with ATM’s I have never once had an ATM tell me it couldn’t accept my envelope.  Never once!

I’m sure in part to save money and in part to be part of the “green” revolution this brain child idea seem full proof to some dolt in an office somewhere who has so much money he hasn’t been to an ATM in years because his fucking accountant takes of it all.  But for the guy, like me, on the street it is not convenient. 

 Two reasons why this envelope and deposit slip less ATM idea is a bad one…

1. Most people remember their first experience with things.  Whether that experience is good, bad, o.k makes a huge difference whether people are willing to put themselves back in that same situation.  This was a terrible first experience and I will probably bitch about it for the rest of my life.  As I mentioned earlier I have never had a problem with an ATM taking an envelope full of money.  

2. I was depositing a 100-dollar bill.  My bank is located on Mission st. in San Francisco.  For those who haven’t ever been here it has a reputation for not being the best area at night to hang around.  Now when I go into my bank I just have to hold my cash out while I continuously try to slip into the ATM that for some dumbass reason refuses to take it.  This is like asking to get robbed, especially if the ATM won’t take the money and you have to leave with it.  

To me this idea seems like a no brainer. Remember that old saying; if it’s not broken don’t fix it.  Well that applies here.  The ATM’s take envelopes, where you can hide how much cash your depositing, why would anyone think envelopeless is better?

Comments

[coakl]

1996 was the first year that the Federal Reserve added ultraviolet anti-counterfeiting features to the $100 bill. The ATM shines an ultraviolet light at each bill and looks for a certain colored line that only shows up under ultraviolet light. Chase does this so that the ATM can give you immediate credit on a cash deposit. Otherwise, you'd have to wait a day or two until someone opens up the envelope and checks the contents. The problem: In that very first year, the feds didn't use enough chemical or ink on that colored line. The reflection is so weak that only a human eye can see it (barely).

[Rob]

They don't accept 1996 100 dollar bills, because they are easy to counterfeit. Utter bull shit! Last I checked it was legal tender.

[Wesley]

Well, here I am just from the bank frustrated, googled this whole "CHASE ATM won't take $100's" deal. MY GOD, I drove up to the ATM, put in $200 (1 100 and 2 50's) and what does it do? STUPID thing spits it back out. So, I was like, "oookayyy".... Did it again, SAMEO thing. Another time, ZILTCH. SO. getting REALLY ANNOYED, I just thought to myself, well maybe THIS ATM is MALFUNCTIONING. I decided to get out of the car and go to a walk up one... SAME BALONEY. *hands planted on face* ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?! Does Chase NOT want my money?!?! I mean REALLY. Anyways, just wanted to vent and share what happened with me, my $100 bill, and the LOUSY NEW ATM's at CHASE.

[Foster]

Man, I was REALLY expecting this story to end with you getting a parking ticket due to the bank delay that essentially negated the $100 you were putting in. Glad that didn't happen.